Fulfillment First, Goals Second & Why It Matters

January 13, 2016

 

 

 A couple of weeks ago right before we rang in the new year, my dining room table was covered in markers, crayons and magazines, and the air was swirling with new dreams, goals and ambitions.
 
My kids, husband and I were creating vision boards for 2016. We spent an hour or so pondering, laughing, and wishing big. (Some markers were fought over too – we’re still working on patience and sharing in my house.)
 
As we went around the table sharing our desires for 2016, I noticed that my husband and I had concrete goals we wanted to accomplish – business, family and otherwise, but when we got to the kids, it was a little different. While there were a couple of goals listed, their brightly colored words and pictures were mostly about how they wanted to feel in 2016.
 
Looking at these sweet poster boards filled with words and phrases like be awesome, feel peaceful, and love made me realize something -

How often do we hold ourselves outside of how we want to feel because we haven’t accomplished what we’ve set out to do?
 
Before we were talked into the story that life is a struggle and working hard is the only way to success, feeling good was just how it was for us. Like the words plastered on my girls’ vision boards, feeling awesome, peaceful and full of love were our ambitions.
 
We were all born with the innate ability to feel good first. Proof is in how our children approach life, especially the little ones. Happiness is their MO. It isn’t until they are taught that outside accomplishments and things they attain will bring them happiness do they begin to live that way.  
 
Goals and ambitions are important. Answering that stirring within gets the painter painting, the dancer dancing, the singer singing, the writer writing, etc., but that doing isn’t what keeps us happy – doing the things we feel called to do is actually an extension of our happiness.  
 

That feeling of fulfillment is within us, so no matter how hard we try, how much we do, how many beautiful experiences we have, if we’re not right on the inside, the joy just won’t last. Nothing outside of us can ever come close to fulfilling us like connecting to the love that is within us can.
 
When we start with how we feel, connect with that feeling of who we are - which is pure love - then take that feeling with us, even the set backs and disappointments won’t seem so devastating, because our worth isn’t at stake. Our feelings won’t rest on what we accomplish when we start out already feeling like we are enough. 
 
It’s a practice - a practice in remembering the natural order of feeling then doing. Remembering that anything we set out to do is merely icing on the cake to existing here, in this time, in this place, and that we are absolutely here on purpose and with a purpose. Worthiness and happiness are our birthright. 
 
So while I kept my goals on my vision board, I’ve changed my approach. I make sure that everyday I do things that accentuate my feeling good and start there. My baseline isn’t catching up to a good feeling – I bring the good feeling with me.
 
Feel good first, then fill in the grid of what you want to accomplish or attain in 2016 and you’ve got a year filled with love and happiness – a year filled with you.

 

I'd love to hear from you, please leave a comment in the comments section below. 
 
 
Lots of good feeling love,


Danielle

 

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Copyright 2018 Danielle Vaughn, LLC